Chapter Twenty-Eight

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Awen prowled outside of Gabriella’s door. She wondered if Gabriella knew she was there. She wanted to go in. She always stopped short. Gabriella’s last words had been haunting her for weeks. Somewhere in there was a spot of love for her, although it had become dark and twisted, just like the rest of her. She wanted to go in there and show her who was boss. No talking. She didn’t want to feel anything other than anger. It was anger that fed her now, made her feel whole. Every night she paced outside of the door. Willing herself to go inside. She couldn’t do it. She felt broken.

 

Gabriella listened with an ear to the door, just like she did every night. She could hear Awen pacing outside of her door. She wanted her to come in. She wanted her love. She had realized being here that she never thought about her husband. She wondered if she had ever loved him in the first place. She had respected and admired him, and didn’t want him hurt. She supposed she loved him in a way, but it wasn’t on the same level as she felt for Awen. She felt terrible for betraying her family, but on some level she thought she would do it again given a chance. She stood there as long as Awen walked in front of her door over and over again. She held her breath every time she paused directly in front of the door. But she didn’t come in and eventually Gabriella heard her footsteps fade away and not return. A tear slipped down her cheek. She felt she would go mad if she kept thinking about the past. She felt responsible for so many things.

She brooded on the chair, a leg thrown carelessly over the arm of it. She fell asleep that way and regretted it when she woke up in the middle of the night with a stiff neck. She moved to the bed and curled up on her side in the blanket, tucking it all around her, with an arm under her head. She lay awake staring at the room she was kept in. It was majestic, but she felt alone. She fell into a disturbed sleep plagued by terrible nightmares and sweet dreams, all mixed together.

Gabriella was listening at the door the next night. Awen was pacing again. She stopped in front of the door and was there for a long time. Finally, the knob turned. It was an eternity before the door slowly pushed open. Gabriella stepped back as the door opened. She swallowed when she saw Awen standing there. She wore dark eye makeup and her hair was half tied back. She wore a short gold colored dress that accented her skin color. The dress came so high up on her thighs that it barely covered her ass. The sleeves were long and opened up after the elbow so that it was looser at her wrists. The scoop neck barely covered Awen’s nipples, which were hard at the edge of the fabric. Gabriella’s throat was dry and she tried swallowing again.

Awen kicked the door shut and walked around Gabriella, trailing her finger along the top of her shoulder blades. “You need to be punished,” Awen purred in a low voice, making Gabriella’s insides tighten. She continued to circle her, touching different parts of her body as she did so; her forearm, her ass, the nape of her neck. Gabriella started trembling at her touches. “But no talking,” Awen stated, pulling a ball gag from her dress between her breasts. Awen watched Gabriella as she inserted the ball into her mouth and fastened the strap. Gabriella was breathing hard through her nose.

Awen kicked the back of Gabriella’s knees and she fell, bracing herself with her palms. She grunted, the pain sharp. Awen walked deeper into the room and when she reappeared in front of her, she was holding a flogger. She must have hidden it in the room somewhere.

“You are mine,” Awen seethed. “I’m going to make you remember that. I’m going to make you know that for forever, you are mine.” She walked behind Gabriella, who was still on her hands and knees. Awen roughly lifted her dress and lowered her panties, striking fiercely at Gabriella’s ass. She screamed, the gag muffling most of her sound. Awen swung the flogger over and over again, cracking the ends on her skin. Gabriella started crying, the pain more than she could bear. She deserved this. She had betrayed Awen, and she would take every punishment that she gave her. She had broken her heart.

Awen ripped Gabriella’s dress and panties off of her and she was left nude. The cold air was hitting her nipples, making them hard as her breasts were hanging from her position. Awen ordered her to get up and she complied as quickly as she could.

“Go to the bed,” Awen commanded. Gabriella walked over to the bed and faced her. “Put your arms over your head.” Awen took the ripped dress and tied Gabriella’s hands to the bed posts with it. She whipped Gabriella’s breasts with the flogger and she screamed. The pain was more intense than her ass being whipped. Awen was not gentle and marks immediately formed. Gabriella was crying and saliva was dripping from her mouth. Awen stopped whipping her to bite the fleshy mounds with her sharp teeth, making Gabriella sob. All she could think about was the pain and that she deserved it. She wept from the pain of past, and the present. For the pain she had caused.

Awen continued marking her body with a viciousness that was palpable. She was causing just enough pain to leave bruising and other marks, but not hard enough to cause permanent damage. Gabriella loved her for that. The love she felt offset the intensity of Awen’s bites and slaps. She understood where the rage came from and she forgave her for that. Gabriella wanted to make it up to her, but she knew nothing would suffice so she took what she was given. She would never forget again.

Awen licked Gabriella’s tears from her face as she took the ball gag off. She took her chin firmly in her hand, her fingers squeezing. “You. Are. Mine,” she enunciated each word on its own, her face so close that Gabriella felt her hot breath on her face.

“Yes,” Gabriella choked out.

Awen claimed her mouth with a ferocity Gabriella had never experienced, her tongue hot and thrusting in her mouth. Awen grabbed her hair and yanked backward, exposing her throat, continuing to kiss her. Awen’s hand closed around her throat, crushing. Awen stopped the kiss and watched as Gabriella’s face turned red and started jerking involuntarily from the lack of air. Gabriella wondered if she was going to kill her. She would die at the hand of her love, in her hand. It was fitting. She felt like a part of her had died anyway the day she had forsaken Awen. She finally let go and Gabriella drew in a long, rasping breath.

“I can’t kill you,” Awen whispered. “I’ve wanted to.”

“I’m sorry,” Gabriella whispered back, her voice rough.

“You haven’t suffered nearly enough,” Awen said, turning away from her.

Gabriella had nothing to say. She agreed. She could only stare at Awen as tears fell, blurring her vision. Her body hurt; a mass of angry red marks. She was cold but didn’t dare say anything. There had been nothing sexual about this encounter. It was brutal domination, and Gabriella understood Awen’s need of it. She had created this monster.

Awen turned back to her and released her arms and hands from their bondage on the bed without saying anything. Her face was a mask and Gabriella tried to see any semblance of emotion. She saw nothing. She didn’t even see Awen’s hand pull back to give her a powerful smack in the face, her head whipping to the side with the force. She kept her head there, not daring to look. She heard Awen leave but she stood there for a long time, feeling the absence. She would rather be in the throes of suffering with her than alone and without her. A part of her wondered if there was something wrong with her for feeling that way, but she shoved it aside.

She crawled into the bed with her aching body. It was hard to move. She was numb for a long time before she started sobbing. She finally stopped when she felt like there were no more tears left. Her eyes were puffy and she wondered if Awen would ever forgive her. They could live happily. They used to bring each other so much joy and happiness and Gabriella yearned to have that back.

The next night, Awen entered her room again to punish her. She was physically punishing her, never bringing any kind of emotion into the act, or anything sexual. She understood that Awen was showing her a physical suffering where Awen had suffered mentally. All Gabriella wanted to do was hold her, but she wouldn’t allow it. Gabriella wasn’t allowed to speak. Every time Awen left her bedroom chamber, Gabriella broke down sobbing. She cried in front of her too. She felt the pain and the absence of Awen. Her body was sore and her mind was completely broken after a week, but she kept coming to her bedchamber every night, reenacting her torture in different ways.

Gabriella couldn’t bear to think about her children. She did once, and she nearly lost her mind. She felt like she was losing her mind anyway. She wondered if her atonement would ever be over. Would she have to pay for this her entire life? She had never really thought about it when she’d been away from Awen, but her imprisonment was making her think about all of this all over again.

Awen returned that night, and instead of tying Gabriella up like she had been doing, she ordered Gabriella to sit on the chair and then stood in front of her, watching her with hooded eyes. She was wearing a mask. Her face was unreadable. She bent down so that she was eye level with Gabriella. “Do you love me?” Awen asked, revealing nothing of herself.

Gabriella swallowed thickly. “Yes,” she answered simply, gazing back.

“How would you prove it to me?”

“I-I don’t know,” Gabriella stuttered.

“Have you learned your lesson?”

“Yes, I have,” Gabriella softly said.

Awen stood up straight again. She untied the gold silk robe she was wearing. Gabriella could tell that she wasn’t wearing anything underneath the thin material. She opened it and let it slink down to the floor. Gabriella couldn’t breathe. It had been so long since she had seen that body, and it still looked the same. Her darker skin was immaculate, with no blemishes or scarring of any kind. Gabriella longed to touch her. She almost reached her hand out, but she knew she had no control. She was a slave, and rightly so. She couldn’t do anything without permission.

“Touch me,” Awen commanded, her voice whisper soft.

Gabriella stood, slowly circling her, dragging her fingertips along Awen’s skin, lightly. It was almost as though the wind was simply rushing by. She ran her fingers up from Awen’s wrist to her shoulder, and over across her back, then down again the other arm. She was facing Awen again, who had her eyes closed. Gabriella’s hands shook as she reached out and touched Awen’s sides, a more firm touch. She could feel how tight she kept her body; as though if she released any tension she might wilt away. They were both hurt. Awen was trying to heal the way she knew how. Gabriella knew it was destructive, but she couldn’t help herself. She was a marionette on the strings. Gabriella leaned in for a kiss but Awen’s eyes snapped open and her hand was instantly grasping Gabriella’s jaw, holding her in place.

“I didn’t say to do that. I told you to touch me.” Awen released her and they both stood there. Gabriella was frozen. She had only been doing what she felt was natural. But Awen was too broken to allow for her intimacy. “I can’t do this,” Awen said, rushing from the room, leaving her robe where it lay on the floor.

 

Awen ran down the hall to her own bedchamber where she flung the door closed, rampaging like a madwoman. Glass shattered she swept everything off the end tables and the bookshelves. Broken glass made her feet bleed but she barely felt it. Emotion was bubbling up and she was panicking. She didn’t know what to do. She was screaming and she cried. She was a broken woman starting to feel again and she couldn’t handle it. Gabriella had broken through. She needed to feel the darkness again. She called to a halfling and when he came to her she ate him alive. She feasted on his flesh as he screamed and she welcomed the sound. Her teeth ripped him to shreds until she hit the bones. She sat on broken glass, covered in his blood and her own, bloated and feeling the dark.

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